I Stand Alone
by Starfire-02
Summary: Rogue runs away from the institute only to be found by someone her choses to help and protect her. ROMY. better summery inside Please R&R to let me know what you think.Rated for self harm and cutting.Name Changed
1. Chapter 1

**Don't Own X-men, We all know that **

**A/N: **Ok so first off i don't have a name for this story yet so any ideas then please let me know they would really help me. Also at the moment I'm only gonna start with a few chapters to see how it goes so please review and tell me what you think  
**  
Summery:** Rogue's life is complicated, no one understands what it's like. She can't touch another human being and inside it is silently hurting her, eating away at her. In her head is no picnic either with the voices in her head always there with their whispered voices, always taunting, always mocking. When life becomes all too much for her she runs. The X-men knowing she has a need for time leave her to be and let her return in her own time. When Rogue is found hurting by Remy he takes in upon himself to help her and hopefully stop her pain.

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**CH 1**

Rogue looked around her small single bedroom at Xaivers School for gifted youngsters. It no longer looked so much like her as it once did. Her personal items were all trapped in one of the two zipped up bags or locked away in the safety of her desk drawers. Tears began to form in her eyes as she picked up her two bags before flicking off the lights and creeping silently out of the building. She came to the garage and wheeled her red and black motorbike out onto the driveway. She carefully stowed her bags away, then got on and drove away into the distant horizon. 

The mansion slowly awoke to the welcoming sun filled day. Rushing water filled the bathrooms and running students filled the halls and kitchen. Through the rush no one noticed the one who was gone.

Pulling her hair into a high ponytail Kitty ran down the stairs only barely keeping her balance to stop her from tripping over. She came to the front door and ran straight through it, searching wildly for her ride. Seeing Scott's red car sitting waiting she ran over a jumped in before it pulled away and sped out onto the main roads headed for school.

Rogue sped through the open roads heading for a place only she knew of. The pulled her bike to a stop and concealed it behind a tree before checking her pockets and walking off into the emerald of the trees. She continued to walk through the forest of tree until she came to a clearing surrounded by trees on one side and a glistening lake on the other. She sat down against a familiar tree and pulled out a heavy metallic object. She weighed it carefully in her hands, testing its weight. She held it up holding the gun to her head, pressed towards her right temple. It had only one bullet cased within it, waiting to be released. Tears ran in glassy veins down her cheeks as she forced her hand to stop it's shaking. Holding her hand stiff and ready she willed herself to push slowly on the trigger.

Remy made his way through the trees, heading towards a lake hidden there. He came slowly and quietly to the spot he believed only he knew of a saw a figure sitting by a tree. He crept closer in a mouse like silence, wanting to take a closer look. He got within several meters of the figure and finally was able to recognize who it was and see what she was doing. Seeing the gun held in her hand, finger prepared to press tightly on the trigger made him start to run towards her. He had seen too much death in his lifetime to let hers be another he would witness; no he had to stop her.

Wind blew through the leaves pushing her hair across her face, but Rogue simply ignored it. A rusting of leaves came from behind it her; a second later her hand was hit off target just as the gun was fired.  
"Chere, what the hell are you doing!" an angered voice question  
But Rogue was not listening; her eyes were focused on the fresh small bullet hole in the tree, a bullet hole that should have been in her head.  
"Chere?" the voice asked again  
Rogue looked down at her hand, the gun was still held loosely in it. She released her fingers and let it slip from her hand. She then fell forwards tears decorating her cheeks, before hitting the ground she was caught within strong masculine arms. Pulling her into his lap Remy held Rogue tightly as she cried salty tears into his shoulder.  
"Why'd you do it?" he whispered  
"You wouldn't understand" she replied through tears  
"So make Remy understand" he retorted  
Rogue only lifted her head and looked him in the eyes, green meet red.  
"I can't" she muttered in a barely audible voice but Remy caught it  
"Let me help" he stated  
Rogue only closed her eyes forcing away the tears.  
"Ok" she whisper  
"You mean it?"  
Rogue felt tears filling her eyes again, shakily getting to her feet she movement away from his reach before running through the trees into the fading light.


	2. Chapter 2

**CH 2**

"Has have any of you like seen Rogue?" Kitty asked walking into the half-full rec. room

A chorus of 'no's' came to her ears in answer to her question. Kitty turned and exited the room to then walked up the staircase to the second floor. She came to the door she was looking for.

"Rogue?" she asked knocking lightly on the door.

Kitty, receiving no answer tried the door handle but found it to be locked. Taking a deep breath ready to risk the Rage of Rogue she phased through the locked door. Entering the room she found it to be emptier than normal. All Rogues' photos and personal items had disappeared from the shelves and desktop. The bed was neatly made and sitting white as snow on top of it was a folded piece of paper. Kitty picked it up and read the words.

"_I have to leave for awhile. Don't look for me. I'll be fine"_

Kitty let the piece of paper drift through the floor.

"Professor!" She yelled running from the room and down the hallway.

Rogue found her way to her bike and collapsed against it breathing heavily. Tears still escaped through her eyes and her lungs were in pain from her run. She knew he would follow, but for now she just had to get away. She climbed shakily onto her bike, steadying herself before pushing off and speeding away. He would find her again but right now she need her space.

Remy stood concealed in the trees watching her speed away. After several minutes her climbed on his own bike and followed her. He would find her again; he was good that way.

Kitty entered the professor's office, phasing right through the door without knocking.

"Professor, Rogue is gone," she cried breathlessly

The professor looked up from where he was working.

"She left a note in her room" the valley girl whispered as tears formed in her eyes

"We'll find her Kitty," the professor said as he wheeled passed her.

Kitty didn't want to go in again but she was the only one around who could get in to open the lock. She clicked the lock open and allowed Xaiver to enter a bare room. Picking the note up off the floor where she left it she then handed it to him. It read the words slowly, carefully taking them all in.

"I'll find her with cerebro and check she's ok" he said

"But professor —" Kitty interrupted

"But nothing Kitty" he replied sternly "she needs some time, leave her be"

Rogue pulled into a motel that had a flashing "vacancy" sign. She walked towards the front desk while pulling her wallet out of her pocket.

"One room for one night" Rogue said

The lady sitting at the desk tapped a few keys on the computer placed in front of her before taking Rogue's money and handing her a key in return.

"Room 2-35" she said returning to her work.

Remy found the motel where Rogue had stopped easily. Her custom worked bike stood out easily and wasn't had to find. Using his skills as a thief he found his way to her room and picked the lock to enable him to enter. The room was dark and empty, with the only light entering from the full moon through a small gap in the curtains. Seeing her know where in the room her turned to leave. He started towards the door when he heard a quiet sobbing coming from the direction of the bathroom. Making his way through the darkness he enter the new room, this one also dark. With his enhanced eyesight he found the girl he was looking for sitting on the floor, her knees curled up to her chest and her head rested on them crying. He made his way over to her and gently touch her left shoulder. At the touch Rogue lifted her head and met his glowing eyes.

"Chere, it's ok" he murmured gently

Rogue just sat looking at him tears rolling down her cheeks. He then pulled her into the safety of his arms and let her cry her heart out. Soon he felt Rogues body relax, looking down he saw the girl had fallen asleep. He lightly picked her up and carried her to the bed, placing her gently down on it before covering her with the blankets.

"Rêves doux chere" He whispered before kissing her forehead lightly _(Sweet dreams)_

**A/N: **Ooh cliffhanger! Don't worry at the moment i'm enjoying this story and have quite a few ideas so I'll update pretty regulary. So anyway enjoy it guys and i'll try get you more soon.

Also thanks to MidniteAngelGoth my first reviewer for this story yay!


	3. Chapter 3

**CH 3**

Rogue pulled herself out of the darkness of sleep, her body was still groggy but her mind was wide-awake and alert. She darted her eyes around the room taking it all in. Sun filtered in through the now partially open curtains. She pulled herself out of bed and walked over to the window and looked across the small town. She carefully opened the window before turning away to sit down on the bed again. Finding the top bedside drawer with one hand she slowly slid it open and felt around for the object she knew was inside. Her fingertips touched cool thin metal, Then carefully found the end of the object and pulled it out. She sat watching, mesmerized but the sun reflecting on the cool metal blade of the sharp kitchen knife. Taking a last look around she aimed the knife, holding it in her left hand she held it above her heart, floating three centimeters away. She turned it to the perfect angle and struck. The knife dug partially into her skin; warm blood began to seep through the hole coating her skin and clothes in red. Still the girl pressed deeper, her aim still sitting in wait.

"Chere!" a voice yelled sternly from the doorway.

Her blood ran cold but still she pressed the knife deeper. The knife struck bone.

"Fuck" she muttered, her angle had been slightly off

Taking the pause in movement, Remy move forward and removed Rogues hand from the knifes handle. He gently removed the knife from her chest and pressed a towel over the wound. Rogue felt her body go weak and her eyes rolled into the back of her head before she fell back onto the bed in his arms.

Remy picked up the unconscious Rogue and carried her in his arms to the whitewashed bathroom. He placed her gently on the cool tiles with her back leaned against the bath. Finding a first aid kit in one of the cupboards he pulled it out and placed it next to Rogue. With his glove covered hand he peeled off her top layer to expose pale skin coated with red blood that was seeping out from the cut in her chest. He pressed another towel over it to prevent to constant flow of blood. He reached down and found the first aid kit, while still holding the towel to her wound he searched with on hand through the first aid kit. He carefully dressed the wound hoping that the dressing would be enough and it would heal without the need for stitches.

Rogue came to slowly feeling the gentle touch of a hand running through her hair. She felt the coolness of the bathtub on her exposed back. She reach her hand up slowly and grabbed on the hand that was running through her hair. Seeing that the girl was awake Remy looked down at her.

"Chere?" He asked questioningly

"What do you want swamp rat?" she hissed at him

"I want to help chere," he replied casually "why do you do it?"

"I told you, you wouldn't understand"

"So make me understand"

Rogue simply looked down at her pale hands.

"I can't touch" she whispered tears beginning to form in her eyes

At her comment Remy just stood up and held out a hand to help her up to.

"Come with me, I'll show you something" he told her

Rogue cautiously took his hand and he led her out of the room. Before leaving she grabbed a simple deep blue tank top and black jacket.

Rogue sat on the back of Remys bike, her arms wrapped around his chest. She desperately wanted to let go and be swept away into the wind only to be crushed on the road, but Remy seemed to be able to sense this and touched her hand gently. She knew him riding with one hand was dangerous so she held on tightly after that. She only wanted to kill herself, no one else. Remy pulled to a stop and Rogue carefully climbed off the bike, taking in all the scenery in order to find any way to escape if necessary. Remy came up behind her and wrapped an arm around her waist.

"This way chere" he whispered in her ears

Remy pressed lightly on her back forcing her to move forward. She found herself being steered in the direction of a hedge surrounded garden. The garden was mostly a grassy area with a brick surrounded pool with water lilies floating on the water surface. On the outside beyond the grass edge stood and decorative lining of flowers. Remy stopped her just on the edge of the pool. He turned the girl to face her and emerald met red. Keeping his eyes on Rogue, Remy carefully removed one glove with his other hand. He lifted it up ready to stroke down her cheek but she turned away.

"Chere?" he asked

"I don't want to hurt you" she whispered

"But you willing to hurt yourself?"

"Yes" she replied turning to leave

Remy reached out and grabbed her wrist in his hand and pulled her back, using his other hand – the one that was uncovered, her turned her face to look at him. Rogue waited for the pull of her powers to start but it never came.

"You can't hurt me chere"

He then leaned down and kissed her forehead before releasing his hold on her to walk back to his bike knowing she would eventually follow.


	4. Chapter 4

**CH 4**

Rogue turned sullenly and followed Remys receding back. He was her way home and not only that but curiosity was filling her, she wanted answers, she wanted to know how and why and he was the one who could tell her that. She caught up with him her steps drifting in time with his. He took her hand in his and squeezed hers lightly.

"Later chere, you need sleep first" he whisper as if reading her mind.

Rogue turned slightly to look at him and nodded. Upon reaching his bike Remy let go of Rogues hand and climbed on sliding the helmet on his head. He waited until Rogue had got on behind him and wrapped her arms tightly around his torso. Running one hand along her arm he then picked up her hand and kissed it lightly on the knuckles.

"Don't fall asleep yet chere. Just hold on tight, it won't take long"

Remy lifted the drowsy Rogue off the bike once they stopped

"Can you walk?" he asked

He watched as Rogue took a few drowsy steps before stumbling and nearly losing her balance.

"With your help?"

Remy just strode over to her and picked her lithe form up into his arms and carried her towards her room. He placed her form on the bed and covered her carefully. Turning away he pulled the curtains closed over the dying sunlight. He walked back to the bed a sat down next to her stroking her silken hair with gentle fingers.

"Don't leave" she whispered reaching out to hold tightly to his wrist.

He looked down at her pale flawless hand holding onto his wrist. Crawling under the covers with her, she then loosened her grip and move closer, he wrapped his arms safely around her and waited until she fell asleep before closing his eyes and following suit.

Rogue walked out of the bathroom, her hair dripping and wearing fresh clothes. She sat on the edge of the bed and looked at the sleeping form of Remy. Turning away slightly towards the window she found her eyes settling on a familiar object. The knife lay abandoned on the floor and ray of light struck it from through the curtains illuminating the red blood the still clung to the knifes blade. Panic forced its way into her body and pain struck into her chest. Her breathing became labored and forced. She forced herself to move, to look away. Slowly she made her way to Remys still sleeping form, crawling slowly, her breath still labored and forced. Her body collapsed just as she neared his torso, her arms stretched one straight in front of her, the other across Remys hip.

"Rem" she choked out hoping he heard her.

"Chere?" his voice came in a sleepy reply

Lifting his head he saw Rogues fallen form. Helping her to sit up he carefully leaned her back against the wall. He moved around the room search for something to help her until he came up with a simple paper bag. Handing it to her he help her with breathing into it until her breathing became normal again.

"What happened chere?" he asked now holding her in his arms

"The knife. Pain. Panic" she whispered in incomplete sentences

Remy leaned over to see passed the side of the bed and saw the knife still lying blood covered on the floor. He released Rogue from his hold before picking the knife up and washing it in the bathroom sink. He then slid the cleaned knife safely into his bag.

"It's ok chere, it's ok" he murmured kissing her hair lightly.

Kitty looked questioningly at the professor

"Is she ok?" she asked

She is fine Kitty; she's not alone. She will return eventually"

Rogue sat cross-legged on the empty bed. Remy has disappear off to god knows where and she was left all along. She stared at the objects in front of her; each placed so perfectly. She picked up the pocketknife in her hand running her fingers over the smooth coating. She placed it down next to the other two objects, a pen and plain pieces of paper. Picking up the pocketknife again she carefully flicked it open testing the sharpness of the blade on her thumb. Blood prickled through the thin cut. She didn't know whether she wanted to kill herself of not anymore but she wanted the pain, the control she had over it when she had control over nothing else in her life. Holding the knife over her left wrist she ran it down following the vein in one movement digging it in deep enough to hurt but not kill. She exchanged hands that held the knife and slit the other wrist. Prickling tears of pain tickled her eyes. She simply picked up the pen and began to write.

_In this moment we both know it's all over_

_Just look who's dying now_

_There's no escape, only fear_

_Regretful of the past_

_Slit wrists redeem the wrong shameful rings of blood_

_But nothing can change it _

_It's too far gone_

_But look who's dying now_

_You've done it wrong_

_Nothing can change the truth_

_It doesn't matter what you say_

_It never mattered anyway_

_In this moment look around_

_We both know it's all over_

_In this moment,_

_It's all over_

_Blood escapes for the pain of another._

She looked down at the deep black words written so neatly on the page. She lay back on the bed pulling her body into a fetal position while also hiding her arms from view. She finally let the tears fall blurring her vision before everything turned black.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: **Hey guys thanks for all your reviews its very much inspiring me to write quicker and the poem from the last chapter is one I wrote last year when I was in english, I got the inspiration from something another person had written on the desk but yea glad your liking it guys.**  
**

**CH 5**

Rogue slowly pulled herself out of the darkness of her mind. She stared down at her blood stained wrist, no blood flowed now all that was left was the dried remainder. Her eyes then settled on the page floating near the edge of the bed. A whimpered sob escaped her lips as she pulled herself from the bed and walked towards the door. She picked up her two bags on her way out not bothering to shut the door behind her. Part of her didn't want to run but all of her knew she had to. She didn't need him, couldn't want him, and wouldn't allow herself to have him. He would hold her back, always stopping her and she just needed to be alone and get away from it all.

Rogue moved quickly, hoping against all hope that she would be gone and put great distance between them before Remy returned. He couldn't help her, no one could. She needed to just work everything out in her own time. Revving her bike once she then drove off towards the horizon heading further south.

Remy pushed the door open further and walked into the deserted room. He knew at once she was gone, her presence could no longer be felt within the walls of the room. He looked around slowly; searching for any clues that may have been left behind. His eyes fell on the white paper lying neatly on the bed. He picked it up and read the words, a poem. He exited the room pulled the door shut behind him. He found his bike and rode off hoping he'd find her before she did anything drastic.

Rogue continued driving with the darkening horizon chasing behind her. The felt a shiver run down her spine causing her body to shake. Still she continued to drive as darkness closed in behind her. When her eyes began to droop and stay awake became a mission did she then decided to stop. Pulling into a shabby looking motel she carefully hid her bike from view before entering the building and getting a room for the night. Rogue lay back on the bed closing her eyes and drifting into a haunted sleep.

She didn't know who she was anymore. Was she still Rogue or was she someone else. The girl felt herself being physically pulled in so many directions. She saw green and felt knives of pain. This then flicked to a whitewashed room with her arms strapped to her side. Next came a beautiful sunshiny day, she was seated on a bench outside and someone was walking towards her. Finally came apocalypse, the war. Rogue then tumbled back into her mindscape; psyches attacked her from every angle fighting for control, for the body.

Rogue awoke screaming, her head pounding, body physically exhausted and sore. She pulled herself out of the bed and walked into the bathroom. Looking into the mirror she saw darkened smudges forming under her eyes, looking closer she notice her eyes were no longer their usual emerald green but a pale blue. Blinking she looked back again only to see brown eyes staring back at her before than flicked to red on black. Blinking once more she found her own eyes back where they belonged. Her were shaking by now, looking down at them she noticed healed cuts running in straight lines between her knuckles as though knives had run through them. She ran a single finger down one cut flinching at the slight pain it brought.

"What's happening to me" she asked her reflection, though receiving no reply.

A/N: (again): Ok so just to fill a few things in, the psyches attack her now because they are not that stupid and know that now she is all alone with no one near her to protect and save her. They also do it while she is sleeping because that is when her mind is most vunerable. So thanks for reading guys, you are like totally awesome.


	6. Chapter 6

**CH 6**

Remy followed her trail southward searching for clues as to where she stopped. At every motel he came to he looked around to check for Rogues bike. He knew she was not stupid and would figure it would give her away so easily, but Remy was a thief and he had tactics even she wouldn't know of. Finally he came to where she was, finding her bike hidden fairly well from sight. Finding her room number he then made his way to it to find her.

Rogue lay on the bed stretched out as far as she could reach. She was afraid to go to sleep, afraid of what could happen within her slumbering mind. Her heard the door to her bedroom creak and turned her head slightly to look in that direction.

"You!" she whispered seeing the person standing in the doorway

She pushed herself up from the bed standing ready to attack or push passed him to escape, whichever one happened to come first.

"Why can't you leave me alone?" she asked

She watched him carefully as she waited for her answer, watching as Remy moved further into the room and closer to her. She saw her chance and in one swift movement she attempted to pass him. As she passed Remy grabbed her upper arm and held on tightly.

"Because…" He paused looking down slightly as though ashamed "Because je vous aime mon ange"_ (I love you my angel) _

Rogue blinked waiting for the words to sink in, but still it didn't make sense, only half the words she knew what they meant so the sentence became jumbled in her mind. Remy noting that she had paused spun her around to face him, then lightly pressed his lips against hers, kissing her softly with light butterfly kisses upon her delicate with her returning every one. Holding his free hand around her lower back he released her arm and ran his fingers through her hair. Pulling back he looked down at her eyes, her body was now relaxed in his arms.

"I love you too Rems" She whispered "but I'm no angel" she finished kissing him again quickly.

"Chere, how'd you know"

"Sugah, I have your psyche inside my head. I found out what it meant from there"

Remy just pulled the girl closer into a tight hug. He gently kissed the top of her head.

"I think it's your bedtime chere" he whispered seeing her stifle a yawn

"Only if you come with me" she replied playfully

Remy just forced the girl backwards until she was sitting on the edge of the bed, he then pushed her backwards and pinned her arms down. He kissed her deeply before running several kisses down her pale supple neck.

"Wouldn't have it any other way" he said releasing her

They then crawled into the bed and Rogue cuddled close into the safety of Remys awaiting arms. Finally she fell into a deep sleep, this time the psyches didn't disturb her.

**A/N:** Ok sorry it's short but I used alot of Romyness in this chapter and I didn't want to ruin 'the moment' with any thing more, but yeah hope you like it anyways


	7. Chapter 7

**CH 7**

Remy lay still holding Rogue in his arms, His eyes looked down on her peacefully sleeping.

"You're un ange chere no matter what you say" he whispered _(an angel)_

Her body wriggled with movement and he loosened his hold to allow her to move. He watched as her body twisted around turning her back towards him, her arms crossed in an 'x' over her chest with her hands holding onto her shoulders. He leaned in and kissed her shoulder lightly, that's when he noticed her hands — they were clenched tightly, so tight that her knuckles were turning white and her nails were digging into her skin. He touched his hand to he waist and felt her flinch from his touch.

"Chere?" he murmured

Inside her head the psyches had grown restless. She had her protection again; someone to help her, but still in her sleep she was vulnerable and her help was only outside her mind. They attacked her while she was at her most vulnerable, hurting and causing pain. They locked her in preventing any escape. The girl was trapped in her own mind.

"Help me" she whispered into her mindscape

"Help me" the words flowed through her lips

Remy looked down at her — his arms was rested safely around her waist in attempt to protect her from whatever he assumed was hurting her. He kissed her cheek lightly.

"Chere, let me in" he whispered knowing whatever it was that was hurting that it was inside her head.

He felt the gently pull of her powers after a small wait, his body then collapsed next to her as he lost consciousness.

Remy found his psyche inside Rogues mindscape. It was a desolate place, looking as though everything had recently been destroyed. Turning around in circles he heard delicate whimpering and wandered in the direction of the sound. Walking through the desolate wasteland he soon came to the source of the whimpering. It was his chere, she was bloodied and bruised and trapped in a makeshift cage.

"Chere!" Remy cried carefully touching several bars in order to make them explode.

He carefully helped her out of the cage.

"Chere you have to wake up. They can't harm you there"

Rogue slowly opened her eyes and leaned up to kiss Remy. He felt her lips lightly on his before she disappeared from before him.

Rogue opened her eyes to find herself back in the 'real world', the one of the truly living and not psyches. She saw Remy lying beside her, now peacefully sleeping.

"Thank you Remy" she whispered before moving towards the shower, her arms full with clean clothes.

Rogue walked out of the bathroom fully clothed. Looking towards the bed she saw Remy was sitting awake now and looking intently at her.

"Chere? Are you ok?"

"I'm fine sugah. Sorry I scared ya"

She leaned down and kissed him gently.

"So how do you do it then sugah?" she questioned

Remy let the question sink in, he knew it would be coming but it still hadn't expected it yet.

"My powers chere. They create a kinetic shield around me; I can lower it if I really want to though. It's invisible to the naked eye but it's what protects me from your powers. Its what allows me to touch you."

Rogue simply nodded.

"I love you Rems," he said kissing him lightly before pushing the kiss deeper.


	8. Chapter 8

**CH 8**

Rogue sat by the window looking out across the thin deserted road. She was completely lost in though and took no notice of what was going on around her. Remy came up behind her and wrapped his arm around her waist.

"What do you see?" Remy asked

Rogue looked up at him and smiled. He carefully leaned down and kissed her forehead.

"I've gotta leave for awhile chere. Will you be ok?" he told he looking into her eyes

"I'll be fine sugah" she replied solely focused on the sea of red that was his eyes

"Ok" he whispered "I'll try not to be too long"

He then kissed Rogue again before exiting the room.

Rogue moved away from the window not long after Remy left and made her way to the bathroom. She could feel a headache coming on and hoped she could stop it before it could get too bad. She opened the cabinet door and looked for the pills that she knew were there. She pulled out the container that held them and tipped it until the pills slid into her awaiting hand. She stared at the whitened pills in her hand, she pushed the nagging feeling into the back of her mind and swallowed them with ease. Rogue felt a dizziness overcome her. Her body was falling, she knew that much. Suddenly she found herself enclosed in darkness.

Rogue heard her screams echoing around inside her mindscape. She knew what had happened now. The psyches wanted control, they wanted freedom but they needed her to be unconscious for them to be able to easily attack her. One of them had somehow taken control for a split second and made her take sleeping pills instead of aspirin. Now she was trapped so they could have their fun. None of them could completely take control, but they could still harm her, causing her pain like she caused them.

Remy walked casually back into the room. He knew he said he wouldn't be long but his errand took him longer than expected.

"Rogue, chere?" he called but received no answer

he wandering around the room looking for signs as to where she was. Finally he came to the bathroom and saw he collapsed body on the floor. Across her skin were a multitude of scratches ranging in size and depth.

"Oh chere, what have you done" her whisper touching her cheek.

Her eyes flicked at his touch but still did not open, he carefully picked he up ensuring he did not hurt her more and place her on the bed. He kissed her lightly avoided the cuts along her cheeks.

"Je vous aime chere, toujours fera" he whispered as he lay down beside her.

Rogue finally opened her eyes again, wincing in pain. She turned her head to the side and saw Remy lying next to her now fast asleep.

'_Shit'_ She thought _'I'm in trouble'_

She reached up a single hand and felt the cuts that ran down her cheeks.

"Fuck the psyches did a number on me" she whispered to herself

Again she looked over at Remy's sleeping form

"I'm sorry Rems" she whispered "I love you too"

She walked out the door picking up the small backpack she had filled with her favourite things and wallet. She made her way to her bike and drove off as quietly as possible, tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Stop running" a voice whispered in her head

"Shut up" she replied through gritted teeth "I'm not running"

"Yes you are, you're running from your life, from your problems, from your troubles"

"I'm not" she whispered tears filling her eyes

"Stop running" the voice told her again

Rogue saw a bridge coming up, one that ran over a river of icy water. She speed the bike up, the wind rushed louder in her ears blocking out the voice.

"Slow down" she heard in a tiny whimper

Her bike hit black icy on the start of the bridge. She skidded out of control, heading towards the weak barrier. She scream covering her face with her arms as the bike hit and she was thrown into the icy water below.

"I'm here for you chere" she heard inside her head as she fell into the icy dark depths of the water.


	9. Chapter 9

**CH 9**

Rogue pulled her head from beneath the cold watery depths. Once above the surface she found herself coughing and spluttering for breath. She pulled more air into her lungs before a wave of rushing water pushed her under again. Again Rogue surfaced pulling desperately wanted air into her lungs, her body was become tired and weak with the effort to keep herself above the surface. Slowly her body began to slip falling again beneath the surface and into the dark unknown depths.

Remy awoke suddenly clutching his hand to his chest. She was hurting and he could feel it. He pulled himself from the leftovers of sleep and ran to his bike, he had to save her, but how long he had to do so he didn't know.

Using the last of her energy Rogue surfaced for what quite possibly would be the last time.

"Remy" she called out wishing he could hear her.

She started to sink back under her body being pushed by the rapids towards the stony, beach-like bank.

Remy came slowly to the bridge, even from a distance he could see the bike crashed part way through the barrier. It was still barely holding on but his chere was gone. Veering sharply to his right he found a way to follow the river hoping he would be able to find her in time.

Rogue forced her eyes open a tiny crack. She felt small rocks beneath her backs and water still floating around her legs. She had been washed up onto the bank for now. Letting her body relax she fell back completely exhausted.

"Remy" she whispered hoping he found her in time.

He came to a slow stop. There she was lying completely defeated on the bank of the river. He ran down to her lifting her head into his lap.

"Chere" he whispered

He ran his hand down her wet cheek before finding her pulse throbbing in her neck. He could barely feel it it was so weak. He picked the soggy girl up in his arms and carried her back to where his bike was waiting. He pulled out his cellphone and found the number he was looking for. Dialing it he listened to the ring, waiting semi patiently for an answer.

"Hello" the voice answered

"Rogue needs your help" Remy told the person on the other end of the phone

"I'll send someone" the voice answered

Remy then hung up the call.

"I'm sorry chere" he whispered into Rogues hair "but I have to do this"

"It's ok Rems" the girl replied weakly "It won't make me love you any less"

Remy cuddled her closer to him kissing her the top of her head with delicate butterfly kisses.

"I love you chere" he murmured

"I love you too Rems" Rogue replied with a gently shiver "I love you too"

Slowly she fell into a cold yet relaxed sleep in his arms every so often shiver with cold no matter how tightly Remy held her with his trench coat wrapped around her soaked body.

The blackbird landed softly and the occupants filed out to find who they were looking for. The moved direction to the area they were told the others were waiting. Their leader came to a halt and he others followed suit.

"Rogue" he whispered seeing the frail girl in Remys arms

Kitty carefully made her way forward to where Remy was sitting holding Rogues shivering body.

"Is…is she going to be ok?' she asked meeting his red on black eyes

"I hope so petite, I hope so." He replied

Scott finally began to act

"The jet isn't that far away," he told Remy "can you carry her? Otherwise Jean can use her telepathy to help"

Remy looked up at the waiting red head. These were the X-men, he could trust them, they wanted to help Rogue just as much as them.

"Can you take her?" he said looking into the redheads' sympathetic eyes

Jean simply nodded and floated Rogues frail body to the jet being careful to make sure nothing more happen to her. The others followed along behind Jean. Once they were on the jet Remy simply made his way to Rogues body, which was now lain out on a plain white stretcher. Through the window beside her he also saw as Jean moved Rogues bike onto the jet and then Remys after Scott had brought it closer.

"Thank you mes amis" he said as they reentered the jet

Turning away from the others he took Rogues hand as the jet lifted into the air to return home.

"Please be ok chere" he whisper kissing her knuckles "I still need you"

"I need you too Rems" she whispered back in the midst of sleep.

**A/N:** Ok so I don't think Scott and Jean are that bad, but I like them a bit better in the movies so I'm gonna make them a little bit more like their movie persona rather than their cartoon one. Though they are still going to be the ages they are in the cartoon.


	10. Chapter 10

**CH 10**

Rogue sat up in the infirmary bed.

"Remy!" she gasped her eyes searching the room for him

"I'm here chere" Remy said entering through the doors "are you ok?'

"I'm fine sugah. What happened?"

"you ran away chere, fell into the river and was washed up onto shore when I found you. I got the X-men to help and they brought us back here. I'm sorry chere"

"It's ok Rems, it's not gonna make me love you any less" she replied leaning up to kiss him.

Remy kissed her back gently.

"I love you chere" he whispered

"I love you too" she replied falling back into the pillows sleepily. "Don't leave me," she said as she held onto his wrist

"I won't chere"

Rogue sat on the bed waiting for Hanks words that would finally release her.

"Can I go now?" she asked

Hank just nodded. Taking Remys hand in her own she allowed him to lead her to her room.

Remy stopped at her bedroom door.

"I'm just gonna be down the hall chere" he told her "are you sure you're going to ok?"

Rogue nodded kissing him once before entering the empty room alone.

Rogue sat alone of the carpeted floor of her lonely room. Her pale skin was completely heal from every cut the psyches gave her, they made her heal with Logans powers against her will, she had no control. She could feel them tormenting her within her mind, teasing and testing how far they could push her. They knew her protection was gone, she'd been separated from him, now they could push her as much as they wanted. Rogue willed her body into the bathroom and searched through the cabinet above the sink. There was nothing to help her there, nothing to help her with the pain the psyches were causing inside her head. Finally becoming frustrated with the noise she turned to desperate measures. She looked out the window at the darkened sky, it was late and no one would be around. Carefully she dug her pocketknife deeply into the skin of her wrist; blood poured out and trickled in rings down her arm. She then exchanged hands that held the knife and cut the other wrist to match the first. Looking down at her hands she suppressed a scream. What had she done?

Remy sat up when he heard the knock on his door. He moved towards it and opened it to come face to face with his chere.

"I'm sorry Rems" she whispered collapsing into his awaiting arms.

He looked down at her, she had her wrists pulled up to her chest hiding them from view. He gently pulled on her arms in order to look at her wrists but she still held them tensely to her chest.

"Relax chere" he whispered feeling her arms loosen

He carefully pulled her arms away and saw the two deep cuts running along her wrists.

"I'm sorry Rems" she whispered again "you were gone and they wouldn't shut up"

Remy looked down at the girl in his arms; tears were slowly forming in her eyes.

"It's ok chere" he told her "I'm not mad"

Holding her shoulder lightly he then led her into the adjoining bathroom and cleaned her wrists before tightly bandaging them.

"It's ok" he told her again pushing her towards the bed

She sat down on the mattress and watched as Remy lay down next to her. The next moment she found herself being pulled into his arms.

"Les rêves doux mon amour" he whispered into her hair as she fell into a relaxed sleep. _(Sweet dreams my love)_

Rogue stood on the balcony of Remys room. Coming up behind her he wrapped his arm around her pulling her close.

"Chere, what's wrong" he asked

"Rem I don't wanna be back here, not yet"

"So we'll leave then" he replied pulling her in closer again to kiss her deeply

Rogue picked up a single backpack filled with only the things she truly needed. She looked around the room, flicking the lights off as she exited. She crept along the hallway, a warm hand slipped into hers when she passed the owners room. She made her way down to the garage, this time she wasn't alone. She climbed on her own slightly scratched bike and watched as Remy did the same.

"Where to now chere?" he questioned

"Anywhere" she whispered in replied before driving away into the horizon with Remy following not so far behind.

Kitty watched out the window as Rogue drove off with Remy in tow. She was gone again, but Kitty knew she would be back.

"She'll come back when she's ready" she told herself

"She sure will kid" a gruff voice replied "now get to bed"

Kitty reluctantly followed the order and headed to her empty bedroom. Looking up at the stars she saw a single one shoot across the sky.

"Make a wish Kitty." she whispered to herself, "I just wish Rogue is okay and has finally found happiness in something"


	11. Chapter 11

**CH 11**

Rogue pulled to a stop by the side of the road, her wrists were aching, sending throbbing pain up her arms.

"What is it chere" Remy asked pulling to a stop beside her.

Rogue just shook her head, this is want she didn't want, she didn't want people to constantly worry about her, to think she was weak and couldn't handle anything.

"You're not chere" Remy suddenly spoke up interrupting her thoughts and bringing Rogue to the realization that she said too much out loud without even noticing.

"It's your wrists isn't it" he asked watching as her eyes lingered on the white bandages.

She nodded in answer, while still looking ahead of her. In the distance she could see lights of a little town, if she could just make it there. Rogue started her bike and moved off ignoring the pain in her wrist.

"Merde what is she doing?" Remy questioned to himself as he followed her.

Rogue finally stopped again, this time outside a new motel. Her wrists were aching in a stabbing pain that shot through her arms at every movement. Rogue loosened her tighten grip and fell forwards onto the bike closing her eyes tightly in attempt to get away from the throbbing pain. Gently, arms came up next to her and lifted her up. They held her tightly and safely filling her with warmth. In the distance she could hear voices, they sounded so far away even though they were so near.

"Dormir bien beau" _(Sleep well beautiful) _she heard whispered in the distance.

Slowly Rogue slipped away into the darkness of sleep within the warm hold Remy had on her.

Rogue heard herself scream loudly.

'_What's wrong?'_ she though thinking she was still asleep

Again a scream came from her throat waking Remy in the process.

"Chere? What's wrong?" he asked holding her shoulders tightly in his hands

Pulling her closer her saw her eyes tightly shut with tears trickling through the corners.

"Chere?" he asked again gently shaking her shoulders

Rogues eyes suddenly flashed opened, but her eyes were not her own. The eyes he saw were blue not the usual green. They flicked changing colour turning to brown, then red, black, and white before reaching their usual green.

"Chere?" he asked looking at her eyes closely

"Let go" she hissed in another's voice

Remy went to pull her closer a scream erupting again from her lips. Her body fell forwards as it was released from whatever had a hold on her. Remy moved to touch her delicate shoulder.

"Rogue?"

He rubbed a small circle on her shoulder until he felt movement beneath his fingertips. His eyes wandered over her fallen body spotting the reddened pools of blood on the sheets. Looking at her hands he noticed her knuckles on her left hand were bleeding in between each one, the other hand was trapped beneath her. Rolling her body over her saw her other hand had sharp metallic claws sticking out through her knuckles, and these ones were not only bleeding but they were also stabbed into her left side.

"Rogue, wake up chere" his whispered watching as he eyes flutter lightly.

Remy tasted blood in his mouth as he bit down on his tongue waiting for a reaction from Rogue.

"Remy" he heard his barely whisper

"I'm here chere, I'm here" he whispered back pulling her closer

A thin scream escaped her lips as the claws retracted back into her skin leaving only the bloodied cuts as proof they were ever there.

"Please chere, you need to heal yourself. I know you can do it, I believe in you"

He watched closely as Rogue began to wince in pain before she collapsed forwards into his arms. She hadn't completely healed herself but Remy could tell the cuts were no longer so deep. Carefully he bandaged each wound before kissing her knuckles and placing her safely in bed to rest.

Rogue moved away from the bed, her mind filling with the past events that had happened. It wasn't safe to be around her, she was too dangerous. All she wanted to do was get away, to keep those she loved safe from her. She had to run again, keep away from everyone and keep them all safe.

Remy moved to pull Rogue closer to him but only found his arm enclosing on empty air. She was gone again. She'd left without a trace. He'd find her, he always did.

Rogue sat on a single swing outside an empty house, swinging it gently in the subtle wind. If only she had control then she could go back, but until then her past was her only solace. She looked at the house behind her. The empty house of her past and childhood, her new solace from everyone.


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: This is a short chapter but I should have a longer one next time, anyway enjoy **

**CH 12**

Rogue looked on as the sky darkened and the sun lowered into the horizon creating an orange glow along the land. Rogue sat still swinging lightly as the darkness surrounded her, only once the cold began to seep into her bones did she return to the comforting inside of the house she once knew. The house hadn't change much in the years since she left. It was a lot the same only now it was empty besides her. Irene and Raven had long ago left, leaving the house empty, left to be coated in dust. She made her way up the semi-winding staircase and came to her old room; it was just as she had left it before she ran away. It was her sanctuary and still was even though she hadn't seen it in years. She lay down on the bed pulling the covers close around her, tears filled her eyes as sleep slipped lightly over her.

Remy ran his hand through his hair. She was still missing and he only wanted to find her again, keep her safe but his body wouldn't allow it. Finding a place to stay he fell back onto the pillows, his mind filled with dreams of his Rogue.

Rogue awoke alone in the once familiar house. She pulled herself from her bed and wandered slowly down the curving staircase, all the while her heart missing Remy. Rogue sat herself down at the wooden table her head pounding with arguing psyches. She could feel her control slipping and no one was there to help her.

Remy found pain slowly filling him, he knew Rogue was in trouble. He could feel her control slowly slipping, melting away with every instance. He quickly packed his things away and climbed swiftly onto his bike. He had to find her, and now that need was even more urgent. Now it was becoming more of a life or death situation.

Rogue fell off her chair, her control was really slipping. Moving herself to stand at the sink she saw within her reflection her eyes flicking colour. Changing from one to another never stopping too long on any single one other than her usual emerald green. She held her hands tightly to the sink her knuckles whitening with how tensely she held them. Her eyes squeezed shut as the pain inside her head became louder, finally forcing her to collapse in a delicate fashion on the floor with sunlight showering over her pale body.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: **Hey guys, sorry for the slower updates, schools back in full swing and with school, primal and other activities I have a bit less time. I'll try to keep up with my updating but they might be slower but I'll do my best. Thanks for reading and keeping up your reviewing, it's just makes me wanna keep going and do more. :)**  
**

**CH 13**

"Why'd you come back?" a voice hissed from somewhere towards Rogues left

"You're not wanted"

The voices grew louder and stronger as more joined in.

"Murderer"

"Killer"

"Thief"

"You should've come back"

"Just leave"

"You can't stop it, you were chosen for this, thief"

"You'll only ever hurt them"

"Go fulfill your destiny!"

Rogue sat up from her collapsed position on the floor gasping heavily for breath. She looked slowly around remembering she was still in the kitchen where she had collapsed. She sat up properly rubbing the pain out of her neck.

"_It's your destiny. You were chosen for this. You can't change a world that is already written"_ She heard whispered through the wind.

Looking around she saw no sources for the whispered voice.

"_You can't run!"_

Looking around again Rogues green eyes met the red glow of another pair. A scream slipped from her lips and encompassed the room.

"Chere?" a voice came curiously through

"Remy?" Rogue answered back

Moving forward he pulled her lithe body into his arms as she fell into tears.

"I sorry Rems" she whispered "I just didn't want to hurt you. I wanted to keep you safe"

"Chere," Remy whispered lifting her chin to look him in the eyes, "you can't hurt me. I love you, it's my job to keep you safe not the other way around. I'm here to help and always will be"

Rogue nodded and fell back into his arms finally able to fully relax.

"_It's your destiny"_

Rogue walked alone, following the dirt path through the now overgrown trees.

"What is my destiny?" she asked the trees knowing no reply would come

Walking deeper she emerged at a clearing she knew so well long ago. Hung from a branch was a wooden swing tied up with strong yellow ropes. Sitting on the homemade swing that she made so many years ago she drifted back in time.

_As a young girl she had been abandoned. Left on the streets without a home, without anyone to look after her. Irene and Raven had taken her in and cared for her. Rogue always thought it was a selfless act they made while she was a child, but now she knew better, they just wanted her for the power she had. They looked after her until several weeks before her powers manifested. They gave her a freedom she would never know again. She still had touch then, she was still normal. Then Irene had a vision, she told Raven that if she stay no matter what Rogue would die. Raven left after leaving just Irene to care for Rogue. Rogues first kiss then was also her last, well until Remy. Her powers manifested at the same time and Cody ended up in a coma. That was the last time Rogue ever saw home again too._

Rogue snapped back from her past feeling a hand touch her back and tears glittered on her eyes. Look up she saw Remy had found her and was watching her worriedly. He leaned down and kissed her. A real kiss that would never hurt him like it would others.

"It's ok chere" he whispered "everything will be ok"

"_Follow the lies if you like. It's still your des6iny, it's still what you were chosen for"_ the voice whispered for Rogue and only Rogue once again


	14. Chapter 14

**CH 14**

Rogue sat alone on the front porch of the old house watching as the sun slowly sunk into the glowing green of the trees. A cool breeze blew through her hair twisting the long locks in gentle waves. Strands of white and auburn blew across her face hiding her emerald eyes from view. Closing hers eyes from the tickling strands she let her mind fall into oblivion.

In the darkness of her mind Rogue saw a lithe figure walking towards her. Though too far away for her to make out who it was she could still make out the shadowed outline of the person. They came to a halt several feet from Rogue, still hidden in shadow.

"Who are you?" Rogue questioned

"I can't tell you, just know I'm here to help" A feminine voice replied, though not a voice Rogue could recognize

"Help with what?" Rogue muttered "no one else can help me"

"I can give you answers, and you already have the help you need anyway. All you need are my answers" the shadow answered

"You can't help" Rogue hissed turning her back on the person

Rogue opened her eyes lifting herself from the depths of her mind.

"Rogue wait" a whisper came through as gentle as the wind but Rogue no longer listened.

Remy walked up behind Rogue and sat down next to her wrapping his arm around her delicate shoulders. She rested her head lightly on his shoulder and cuddled closer to him fighting the tears that were willing her to let them out.

"Chere?" Remy whispered "you're shaking, what's wrong?"

"I'm sorry Rems" she whispered back pushing away from him and walking towards the near sunken sun.

Remy left her to walk some way away from her before he followed. Catching her wrist in his hand he turned her to face him.

"Talk to me chere" he said looking into her tear filled eyes

Rogue fell into his arms and cried silent tears as he held her tightly. The sky darkened and rain began to fall but the two remained as they were. Rain mixed evenly with Rogue's tears and the rain plastered her long hair to her pale skin. Rogues tears finally disappeared into thin traces on her cheeks to be washed away by the cold rain. Still she continued to stand in Remys safe arms in the rain. Only when a shiver ran down her spine and he saw her lips turning a dark pastel streaked blue did Remy lead her inside to the warmth. He gently pushed her towards the bathroom but her hand still clung to his wrist.

"Don't leave me" she whispered

"I won't chere" he replied gently kissing her "I'll be right here"

Rogue entered the bathroom peeling off her wet layers to step in the warmth of the shower. Carefully she rubbed the life back into her limbs. Stopping the warm flow of water she stepped out of the shower and dressed in clean dry clothes. She left the bathroom and walked downstairs where Remy was waiting. He stood at the counter of the kitchen making the pair hot chocolate when she entered.

"Hey chere" he called over his shoulder as she sat down.

He then picked up the two mugs placing them both on the table, kissing Rogue's head before sitting down beside her.

"Ok spill chere. What's up?"


	15. Chapter 15

**CH 15**

Rogue looked down at her clasped hands then wearily she looked up to met Remys awaiting eyes.  
"I can't help if you don't tell me chere" he softly told her  
"No one can help me" she replied tears filling her eyes  
"But chere I love you, even if I can't I wanna try. Please chere, please let me"  
Rogue looked at his saddened eyes and something inside her told her she was hurting him more by keeping it from him.  
"It's hard to explain" she whispered timidly  
"So just try chere" he answered pulling her into his arms  
Once she started Rogue found the words came easily, slipping between her lips as easily as water flows from a tap. Remy simply sat in total silence letting her talk.

Rogue stopped into silence as the words stopped flowing. Remy gently pulled her into his arms and rocked her ever so slightly as she slowly fell into sleep after the long exhausting talk. Now though he knew, and now he could help her in any way possible.**  
**

A/N: Hey sorry it's short I couldn't think what i wanted to write so yea I thought I'd just leave it at that for now.


	16. Chapter 16

**CH 16**

Remy gently pulled the girl in his arms closer to his body never wanting to let her go. She was the reason he live, why he could be happy once again away from his terrible past. Rogue slowly emerged from sleep to find herself held closely in Remy's arms.

"I love you sugah" she whispered before drifting back into her mind.

"Can I help now?" a voice came from behind her

Rogue turned around searching her mindscape for the voice's owner only to find herself came face to face with the person. Looking into the ever-changing eyes of the person Rogue saw a near copy of herself, her own being. The girl had long, long hair drifting down to her waist, its auburn locks plaited in two separate plaits running down her back. At the front lay two white streaked bangs only reaching to curve just under her delicate chin. Her body was lithe and scantily clad with a torn black halter-top and skirt. The girl had ivory skin with a creamy sheen to it, and her eyes, her eyes were ever changing, mockingly turning from one colour to another. From greens, purples and blues, all the colours of the rainbow.

"Who are you?" she whisper her fear evident in her whispered voice

"I am you" the voice replied "and I'm here to help you. You have a choice the world is in your hands, you can be the savior or the destroyer. It's up to you."

Rogue meet her copies eyes, now a steely blue.

"Tell me" she muttered

"You have to return to the mansion, gain control. Soon you'll be attack, you will have to kill for the price of invulnerability but those who love you will forgive and help you. After this part is over the world will be attack, the skies will darken and their fate will rest on you. You have a choice you can save or destroy humanity. You are the one who is chosen for this, you are the only one with power to stop this. You stand alone, it's all up to you and only you"

"I stand alone" Rogue whispered as the mindscape misted over and she began to awake.

"I stand alone" Rogue murmured through sleep before waking up to the emptiness of the bed.

Rogue pulled herself from the bed and ran to find Remy. In the kitchen she found him sipping coffee at the table.

"Rems" Rogue cried rushing to his now open arms "we have to go back, I have to learn control. It's all up to me, I stand alone"

"Chere?" he questioned pulling her close and kissing her hair

Rogue spilled out what had just happened in basics, feeling his arms pulling her closer with every word.

"It's ok chere. We will gain you your control together before we return. I'll follow you wherever you want to go, whatever you want to do."

He kiss he lightly before she pulled the kiss in deeper banishing all thoughts from her mind just for that single moment of peace and happiness.


	17. Chapter 17

**CH 17**

Rogue sat on the front doorstep with Remy crouch in front of her.

"Focus chere, concentrate" he whispered soothingly

Watching as her brow furled with concentration he couldn't help but laugh a little.

"You know chere this would be easier back at the mansion. More subjects to torment"

"Whatever" She replied pulling herself from her spot and disappearing inside.

It was beginning to rain with light butterfly droplets by the time they were ready to leave.

"Come on chere" Remy called from his bike

Rogue ran down the steps towards him and climbed on the bike behind him, into the growing rain they speed off, the house to be alone once more.

The rain was finally subsiding just as the reached the mansion, unfortunately the pair were soak through and through and upon entering the house they were stopped by a ready to kill wolverine who forced them down to the medical wing to be looked after. Finally they found themselves released to the comfort of their own room.

"Who first?" Rogue whispered through the artificial lightened room.

"Jean?"

Rogue nodded, Jean could be nice but seemed to have something against her, maybe Jean just could let past mistakes remain that way. Creeping out of the room they found Jean easily, focusing on controlling her powers Rogue reached out and touched the back of her neck. Jean shrieked at the cold touch of Rogues fingers but that pull of her power didn't come yet. Still touching Rogue waited until several mintues later a tiny pull start and then she let go.

"Not too much longer chere" Remy whispered from where he'd watched the display while Jean stood shocked watching as they left.

Rogue sat huddled in the window seat a book held forgotten in her hands as she looked out the window. Footsteps enter the room and came up behind her.

"Who is she?" she asked turning towards Kitty who was now standing next to her

"Who?" Kitty asked moving to look closer "The blonde?"

"Yea"

"That's Emma, she's from the Hellfire Club, got her eye on Scott. She's here working with Professor or something, I don't really know the details."

Rogue nodded as she watched the blonde princess exit the mansion grouds.

"So how are you?" Kitty asked touching her shoulder gently

"I'm good Kit, I finally got control but now I'm worried about the killing part."

Kitty nodded she knew about what Rogue had to do, Rogue had confided only in her and the Professor, no one else needed to know. She just wish she knew more about what she could do to help but it was Rogue's thing and only her.

Rogue stood alone the streets near deserted in the darkness of the night, she didn't know where she was or how she got there. She was just there. A figure approached her, a blonde girl who look fairly strong.

"So you're the bitch who thinks you can get the better of me?" the girl hissed

She was poised and ready to fight but Rogue was simply just dead confused. A fist flew slamming Rogues cheek hard ripping skin as it did. Rogue felt her psyches ready themselves each moving to the surface waiting for their chance to have a little bit of control and power. The girls fought neither one ready to admit defeat when like lightening it happened, rogue's hand found bare skin and the pull of her powers began. She tried to stop them but all control was gone, she couldn't move she was glued there. She felt as the girls life force filled her body, her name was Carol Danvers she was a mutant with the power of invulnerability. A power that was now Rogue's. all she could do was watch through her own eyes as she killed this innocent girl with no power to stop it. The girl collapsed dead on the ground and Rogue moved several paces away before she too faded into her own darkness on the ground.


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N:** Italics are the voices. Also apologies about staying the claws were metal when they should be bone, i'll fix it asap.

**CH 18**

Rogue awoke to the coldness of concrete beneath her cheek; she had no idea what had woken her or even where she was. Her mind was a shambles, a total mess of memories and she could decipher her own from the ones of those she'd touched. She only knew that one voice was louder than all the rest now, one very new voice that screamed with great intensity.

_"Killer! You fucking killed me bitch. I had a good life better than yours could ever be and you fucking killed me!"_

She felt the dim feeling of hot tears gracing her with their presence on her cheeks.

"What have I done?" she whispered only to herself

Climbing unsteadily from where she had fallen, she waited for her balance to realign itself before he set off running blindly. The sounds and music began to fill her ears with their joy as the approach the new street, this one full of different bars, all tempting customers to come in and enjoy a night of freedom. Entering the most appealing bar Rogue found herself an empty stood and sat her head pounding from the screaming girl.

"What can I get you?" A blonde waitress asked standing over Rogue

"Something strong, real strong" Rogue replied as she listened to the stronger growing voices.

…_just so worthless…_

…_why bother trying anymore?..._

…_just kill yourself…_

… _killer that needs to be sent to an asylum…_

…_your just a crazy vampire bitch…_

Tears began to fill her eyes again at the harsh words spoken.

"I'm not worthless" she tried "I can touch"

Her words only whispered away like mist leaving her with no hope. The waitress returned with her drink leaving without a second look. Picking it up Rogue drank deeply; feeling the sting of alcohol hit her.

…_just so worthless…_

…_why bother trying anymore?..._

…_just kill yourself…_

… _killer that needs to be sent to an asylum…_

…_your just a crazy vampire bitch…_

The words hit her again, louder, stronger. The bounced in her mind harshly and cause her grip to loosen on her glass, all she could do was watch as the glass fell, shattering into tiny crystalline piece across the wooden floor.

"That's one way to get attention chere" a voice whispered to her right

Assuming it was only her imagination she left it alone not bothering to turn and look until she felt a reassuring hand reach down and intertwine its fingers with hers.

"Remy" she whispered turning to look into his calm crimson eyes.

"Now chere I see you've got the attention you wanted…"

Looking around she saw many people had turned to the point where the crash had happened

"But I am very curious why a belle femme like you is here drinking alone"

"Oh I only just killed some strange chick out in some god forsaken alley before I fainted and woke up, made my way here and chose to drink my pain away. Hey I could do worse" she replied her words dripping with sarcasm.

Remy look tenderly into her eyes as she picked up the new drink she'd been brought and slipped delicately. The alcohol sizzle into her system and the voices quieted. She let more of the alcohol sizzle down her throat blurring the colours and sounds around her but also removing the voices within her mind. From the outside she could feel little of what was going on but she knew completely that her sanity was finally toppling over the edge. She felt the warmth of tears tickling at the edge of her eyes as realization hit her on how far her life had truly been pulled apart. She'd fought over a lifetime of enemies only to find more and when something started to go right it was stolen from within inches of her grasp. She didn't want to be seen crying, pride wouldn't let her, it was the one thing that could keep her together hold her façade straight, but the pride she had left was slipping through her fingers like unseen moonlight she'd held onto for too long. Once the pride she had was shattered all she was would be a normal, emotional girl – a normal, emotional girl who cried alone in a dark smoky bar. In all truth she wasn't alone, proof opened her eyes when the familiar arms of another being pulled her into their comforting embrace as her release tears fell down her cheeks blinding out the world before her. She'd forgotten he was there, but now she was simply glad he was, he gave her strength she'd forgotten she had within herself, and within his arms she knew no matter what was thrown at her she knew she'd make it through. It was true what they said; every tunnel had a light at the end.


End file.
